TOYS R US IN PS3 PRE-ORDER LIES SCANDAL
"I work at a Toys R Us store on the multimedia section, and our PS3 pre-order campaign is not going very well.
"We have big signs up advertising that you can reserve one, with NO deposit or obligation - that's a FREE RESERVATION - and no-one wants to. At first our manager told us to approach customers looking at the display, but mostly they were just looking out of idle curiosity and what they really wanted was a Wii (sold out), Xbox 360 (sold quite a few of those!), a PC (actually sold a few of those too!), or Yu-Gi-Oh cards. For some reason people still buy those. But no-one wanted a FREE PS3 reservation.
"So, in mid-afternoon my manager got all the multimedia sales staff to put through a reservation (which I felt very dirty doing), so he wouldn't get shouted at quite so much by the store manager, then told us to approach all the customers even if they were just looking at Hungry Hungry Hippos. Still no success, but we got more Wii enquiries and another 360 sale.
"By late afternoon my manager was getting desperate and started making announcements on the tannoy that customers could reserve a PS3 for FREE, but mostly they just kept wandering around looking at the Lego Gang Land sets, or the Bratz Prostitutez dolls, or whatever is popular with the kids these days. So the manager then canvassed all the staff members on all the other sections to put some pre-orders through the tills so it looked like people care about Sony.
"So, all in all on this busy Saturday, we did several PCs, a fair number of 360s, and we could have sold record amounts of Wiis if we had any - and a couple of PS3 orders from staff members who were forced into it.
"It was the 3rd best day of work ever (the 2nd being the time I worked for Game and read magazines in the stockroom all day, and the first being the time I played Unreal Tournament on my laptop at the railway station cafeteria when all the platforms were closed for maintenance but my manager told me to open it anyway)"
Labels: MEAT BAGS (WOMEN)
January US sales totals:
Thought you might be amused to see that the PS3 is currently placed at number 93 in Amazon US's top-selling Video Games list thingy, meaning that outselling it in 90th is Crazy Machines: The Wacky Contraptions Game on the PC and Mac, by the fine people at Viva Media.
Apparently "Crazy Machines gives you the chance to build your own unique contraptions. Solve more than 200 challenging puzzles, and put your machines to work". I must admit, my slacks did begin to bulge somewhat while copying and pasting that, and already I'm more excited about Crazy Machines: The Wacky Contraptions Game than I am about that PS3 thing.
Other items currently selling more than the PS3 include:
- Cooking Mama on DS
- Karaoke Revolution Party on PS2
- Game Boy Advance SP Pearl Blue (yes, a GBA)
- Mario Kart Double Dash on GameCube (yes, a game on a "dead" console)
- Final Fantasy VIII on PSone (yes, PSone)
- Brain Training on DS (even though everyone has it now)
It would also appear that the window Lee Harvey Oswald allegedly leant from when
allegedly shooting JFK was also sold on eBay but the offer was then withdrawn:
...but the fact that someone at some point offered money for it means that it's technically sold more than the PS3 as well. And I bought a copy of Joe Montana's Sports Talk Football 93 on the Mega Drive for £1.99 out of Gamestation the other day, so I reckon that means it's now selling more than the PS3 too.
So when I bought a Wii it involved rapidly refreshing amazon.co.uk at 9am and using my uni's huge bandwith to press f5 fast enough to bring a lady elephant to orgasm before they all sold out.
Play.com's been selling their launch allocation of PS3s and are stopping when they run out. I first checked at 12:30pm and as of now (9:30pm) they're still in stock.
HOW THEY EXPLAIN THEMSELVES:
Saddle up with PONY FRIENDS
The new Nintendo DS title from Eidos
Eidos interactive, one of the worlds leading publishers and developers of entertainment software, is pleased to announce PONY FRIENDS, a virtual pet game designed exclusively for the Nintendo DS and developed by Australian based Tantalus, will be available in the UK in 2007.
Fill your stables with a choice of 6 real life pony breeds or customise your own. Personalise your pony by choosing its favourite colour and food and then take part in events throughout the calendar year. Immerse yourself in caring and grooming your pony or undertake surprise challenges from a cast of characters. Personalise your pony's mane, tail colours or accessories with a wide variety of saddles, shoes, blankets and bridles to choose from.
"PONY FRIENDS is a very exciting project for Eidos. We're fulfilling every child's dream by giving them their very own portable pony. Players will have so much to occupy their time with from caring for and grooming their ponies and snapping photos whilst riding picturesque country trails to teaching their pony new tricks and entering them into a variety of competitions." Said Helen Clark, Brand Manager Eidos.
Use the DS stylus to perform a huge range of varied actions; including cleaning stones and shells out your pony's hooves, brushing its mane or designing a unique saddle blanket. Daily play will ensure that your pony is the prettiest, healthiest, fastest, most talented, and best pony, scooping you first prize in the prestigious 'perfect pony competition'.
IDEAS FOR MORE 'SEXY' GAMES
SEXY MONKEY BALL: 100 bananas = banana goes in mouth
SEXY MONKEY BALL: 1000 bananas = banana goes in bottom
SEXY SONIC: 100 rings = item of Cream's clothing comes off
SEXY SONIC: 1000 rings = Cream loses all inhibitions after eating one of those mushrooms in the background and you have 15 minutes with her limp body before she realises what's happening.
Labels: MEAT BAGS (WOMEN)
Labels: PR DISASTER
1. Nintendo DS Lite: 194,526
2. Nintendo Wii: 83,754
3. PlayStation Portable: 35,700
4. PlayStation 2: 20,995
5. PlayStation 3: 19,996
6. Xbox 360: 7,365
WHAT SONY MEANS WHEN IT SAYS "SHIPPED":
Moved from regional storage facility A to regional storage facility B Put on a boat to somewhere else that may want them In a lorry In a pile waiting to be put on a lorry Hidden in the ground
A site about games and game paraphernalia and how nothing's as good as we remember it, probably because we used to inhabit a FANTASY WORLD.
What are we half-heartedly skimming RIGHT NOW?
Each post .02% worse than the last.
THE HTML ERAS
When men used to till the pages by hand.
12 years of wheat and chaff in one vast and impenetrable mass.
Some updates weren't universally hated by the entire world within seconds of being uploaded.
Links to that blog of yours you started up and were excited about for a whole weekend.
Some people we might've MET. Or at least seen in a room and been near.
Other sites we are happy to officially endorse without requiring Adwords spend.
Having one is compulsory, apparently. Ours is here. It is not meant to be funny.
People off the internet. Quality and commitment levels may vary.
It came with the template. Maybe in 2014 we'll jump on board the Twitter train and put that in here. Or a radio. That'd be nice.