Worst Idea of 2005 Shortlist Entry #1: The Gameulator
And it's only £300.
If you'd like to know more read the entire press release or visit the perhaps-even-worse-than-that web site.
LAZY WEB JOURNALIST BASES ENTIRE STORY ON WHAT A SHOP SAYS
This happens every single day now. It’s getting tiresome the way our news sources are full of the half-arsed observations of lazy cocks who think research is refreshing Amazon. Do you really think the Web Admin Assistant who updates 50-million pages a day at Amazon has a hotline to Sony, Microsft, Valve and Nintendo, or are they, perhaps, just guessing?
The fact that the date just-so-happens to be a Friday, only means Web Admin Assistant Steve knows games come out on Fridays, hence him randomly picking a Friday. Honestly. Some people.
SEGA beats EA!
Look! Some magical old 2D games have knocked the piss-poor Need for Speed Underground 2 off the top of the charts! This will probably result in Sega buying EA and turning all EA’s dull sport/car franchises into colourful arcade dreams! Dreamcast 2 is surely imminent now! Go Sega!
After the hostile buyout, Sega will sack all EA staff and only keep about three of the most profitable franchises alive (which will be phased out over the next 18 months until nothing remains).
What the internet's for
When programmer Ian Ternet first created his global network of computers for the distribution of hi-res photos of actress Kirsten Dunst he could hardly have imagined just how successful his invention would be. Now used for so much more than simply distributing hi-res photos of Kirsten Dunst, the IanTernet PC-to-PC Dunst Link Protocol (commonly shortened to internet) has grown -- and keeps growing! -- to include photos of most Hollywood actresses and several TV stars.
What we're reading at the moment, although we keep losing interest halfway through chapter two.
A site about games and game paraphernalia and how nothing's as good as we remember it, probably because we used to inhabit a FANTASY WORLD.
MICRO-BLOG
What are we half-heartedly skimming RIGHT NOW? RECENTLY...
Each post .02% worse than the last. PLEASE WELCOME ABOARD... JONNY! ADVANCE NOTIFICATION OF "CHANGE" THERE WAS AN 'EVENT' FOR OVERLORD II CANADIAN PAWN SHOP SONIC GRAFFITI THE SEGA US FLICKER ACCOUNT HAS BETTER/STRONGER MA... INDUSTRY NEWS: MIKE RAWLINSON FROM ELSPA HAS GOT S... LITERALLY 30 PHOTOS FROM A MAN'S "SEGA HONEYMOON" THEY HAVE LAUNCHED WORLD OF WARCRAFT IN A FOREIGN ... AN EMAIL FROM THE NiGHTS COSPLAYER WITH THE SMALL ... A SMALL PIECE OF RIPPED-OFF POSTER SOMEWHERE IN GE... THE HTML ERAS
When men used to till the pages by hand. |
SHOPS
Use our Play or Amazon Shops to buy those shit Wii games you secretly like, helping the effort. ARCHIVES
12 years of wheat and chaff in one vast and impenetrable mass. |
Some updates weren't universally hated by the entire world within seconds of being uploaded.
1. The Animal Crossing Wild World mega-feature and public-service review
2. Sonic CD - screenshot parade
3. Cream The Rabbit sexual diagrams
4. OutRun2 screenshot-taking guide for the benefit of inept journalists
5. The personal UKR SEGA Toys Homestar planetarium review
6. Trying to buy an Xbox 360 in London
7. (STILL) THE MOST AMAZING PROMOTIONAL PHOTOGRAPH OF ALL TIME
8. A trip to GamesMaster (in Peckham)
Links to that blog of yours you started up and were excited about for a whole weekend.
FRIENDS
Some people we might've MET. Or at least seen in a room and been near. One Thousand Tiny Things I Hate "LIFESTYLE"
Other sites we are happy to officially endorse without requiring Adwords spend. PRIVACY POLICY
Having one is compulsory, apparently. Ours is here. It is not meant to be funny. |
ACQUAINTANCES
People off the internet. Quality and commitment levels may vary. |
It came with the template. Maybe in 2014 we'll jump on board the Twitter train and put that in here. Or a radio. That'd be nice.