When and where did you meet Richard Jacques?
My interview with Richard Jacques was actually over the phone. But I did meet him last week at the Develop conference, when I stood outside the Metropole having a cigarette instead of attending the session on Practical Multi-Threading for Game Performance.
How long did you spend with Richard Jacques?
On the phone, about 15 minutes. In person, about 12 minutes. Richard Jacques stayed talking to me even after I had finished my cigarette, so I expect he fancies me.
Did the time fly or drag?
It flew. I probably only spent 12 minutes standing with Richard Jacques outside the Metropole, but it felt more like just under half an hour.
Was the conversation free flowing and fun, or did it occasionally feel awkward and forced?
It was free flowing and fun, just like most of the music of Richard Jacques.
How do you have a conversation with someone? Whenever we try it ends after about three goes, with us sitting there in silence just thinking "THINK OF SOMETHING TO SAY, THINK OF SOMETHING TO SAY".
Try taking up smoking. Then you will always have something to say i.e. about how you were going to give up when the ban came in but you haven't got round to it yet but you will and it is a good thing for the staff in the bars and you do get to socialise outside more ha ha but it would be better if the weather wasn't so changeable. This always works well as long as no one mentions cancer.
Did you ask any questions he refused to answer?
What was he wearing?
On the phone, I don't know; while we spoke I imagined him in a purple velvet jacket with a ruffled shirt and Mozart hair. In person, he was wearing jeans and a shirt that said RICHARD JACQUES on it, and was bald.
Did he appear to be in good physical shape underneath?
Richard Jacques is a fine figure of a man.
What does his skin look like up-close? Were there any blemishes or marks?
I do not remember much about his skin, sorry.
Was he recently shaved?
Yes, although I could only see his face.
Did he smell of Lynx shower gel? He looks like he'd smell of Lynx shower gel.
I have avoided men who use Lynx shower gel since 1998 so I have almost forgotten what it smells like, but I don't think so.
Did he mention SEGA at all, or has he 'moved on'?
Richard Jacques did not mention SEGA. Sorry.
Did you ascertain his marital status?
No. There was no "Mrs Jacques" in the immediate vicinity though.
Where was he going after, and what was he doing later?
He was going back to the audio track at the Develop conference. Later on he was probably going to compose some music or something I expect.
Will you be keeping in touch?
Probably not after this.
A site about games and game paraphernalia and how nothing's as good as we remember it, probably because we used to inhabit a FANTASY WORLD.
What are we half-heartedly skimming RIGHT NOW?
Each post .02% worse than the last.
THE HTML ERAS
When men used to till the pages by hand.
12 years of wheat and chaff in one vast and impenetrable mass.
Some updates weren't universally hated by the entire world within seconds of being uploaded.
Links to that blog of yours you started up and were excited about for a whole weekend.
Some people we might've MET. Or at least seen in a room and been near.
Other sites we are happy to officially endorse without requiring Adwords spend.
Having one is compulsory, apparently. Ours is here. It is not meant to be funny.
People off the internet. Quality and commitment levels may vary.
It came with the template. Maybe in 2014 we'll jump on board the Twitter train and put that in here. Or a radio. That'd be nice.