Of particular note is his facial expression. He knows he's not really supposed to be in this photo of Ubisoft's Jade Raymond. Everyone likes Ubisoft's Jade Raymond and he's being careful not to get in the way of any important bits of her body.
Here's a close-up of that beard. The trimming is perfection! Anyone who's ever experimented with facial hair will know that the neckline is several hours of work alone, and the uniformity of length is nothing short of a masterpiece. We can only hope he's being this meticulous in his work on Assassin's Creed!
And this is her, Ubisoft's Jade Raymond, the one everyone likes. Frankly, textbook chin-down-shoulders-back-look-and-smile up or not, we're still not convinced video game development is the right place for a woman to be, regardless of how many WOMEN GAMERS IN GAMES conferences Aleks Krotoski has organised in her flat this month. They literally just don't really understand games.
JERRY'S FINAL THOUGHTS:
Still, as long as Ubisoft manages to get acres of press coverage by shoving poor Jade in front of every game journalist's Casio Exilim while pretending it's doing it for "equality" rather than "here's a pretty girl from our office you can talk to about texture maps," it'll be worth it.
OTHER PERFECTLY LEGITIMATE REASONS TO NOT LIKE UBISOFT:It releases the same squad-based game only with a different name at least five times a year, triggering a Pavlovian reaction in us that makes us turn off everything electrical in the house upon hearing the phrase "Tom Clancy's...". Being MADE to review Splinter Cell because no one ever wants to review Splinter Cell because Splinter Cell is boring, too hard and rubbish, and only liked by weirdos who pay fat prostitutes to sandpaper their cocks in dungeons at the weekend while they let out the tears of pain away from the wife and kids. It has announced a Wii game called Horsez 2 and if that isn't a sign that another video game crash is no more than six months away, we don't know what is.
Labels: GONZO
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Some updates weren't universally hated by the entire world within seconds of being uploaded.
1. The Animal Crossing Wild World mega-feature and public-service review
2. Sonic CD - screenshot parade
3. Cream The Rabbit sexual diagrams
4. OutRun2 screenshot-taking guide for the benefit of inept journalists
5. The personal UKR SEGA Toys Homestar planetarium review
6. Trying to buy an Xbox 360 in London
7. (STILL) THE MOST AMAZING PROMOTIONAL PHOTOGRAPH OF ALL TIME
8. A trip to GamesMaster (in Peckham)
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It came with the template. Maybe in 2014 we'll jump on board the Twitter train and put that in here. Or a radio. That'd be nice.
Shoes.
dzpppxqqq - Why are these things so fucking long?
I have this incorrect perception that because she is a video games producer, she may want to talk about video games. Normally, fit girls don't want to talk about video games, so this was a real fringe of reality moment.
So, I spoke to her about Assassins Creed and much to my surprise she didn't seem that interested. So, the conversation abruptly ended and I walked away.
She did seem very interested in having her photo taken though.
I'm beginning to think it's just that I was a dullard.
If Ken had grown a beard like that he may have been able to convince me that the PS3 was not shit.
http://img209.imageshack.us/img209/2782/beardsee7.jpg
I'd try thinking about Amy Rose violating Big The Cat with a strap-on Dreamcast fishing controller, possibly on a nice bit of carpet.
She wasn't interested? Talking about the very game she's supposedly "producing"?
Is there a chance - shock horror - that she isn't involved in the game production in the slightest, and is in fact just a pretty little propaganda spouting mouthpiece ubisoft parade around the media, pretending to be the producer in an attempt to make them (and the game) look slightly "hipper"?
Nahh, videogame companies don't outright lie like that to gain publicity, surely!
The bloke in the 1st photo has the expression I make in games shops around playstation chavs, yes they are dangerous, and they WILL kill you if you don't 'lend' them 10p to get home.
Ubisoft deserve some kudos for supporting Nintendo and not being biased toward one format, they just need to improve on the critisisms of Red Steel and Far Cry and they'll have a Wii hit on their hands.
Prince of persia classic on XBLA is bloomin' brilliant.
Hmmm, I'm sure I remember Ubisoft being involved with the seedy world of media prostitution before.
Something to do with moderately attractive wannabe 'starlets' being paid to convince sad loser gamers that if they bought product then one day, they too could touch a girl, perhaps at a LAN that the slatterns were attending FOR THE SHORTEST POSSIBLE TIME ALLOWED BY THEIR CONTRACT.
Now what were they called? The Spag Bols, no... the Jag Lolls, the Frag Dolls! That was it.
Whores.
guvjb - the man in charge of stopping the chavs who work at JB Sports from stealing all the stock instead of working.
Two thirds of the above statement is a lie.
fqakh-- The noise a french woman makes if you try to shave her armpit hair, as it is the secret to her incredible strength.
he has got a slightly Howard Moonish quality to him.