UK:RESISTANCE 'main page'
Tensions have been simmering for a while, but this "review" of Heavenly Sword takes all of the biscuits, eats the biscuits, then spits them out in the face of all that is holy.

Heavenly Sword PR review SHAME

This is the oddest thing to have happened in the very odd history of Sony's Euro PR blog. It is Sony, reviewing one of its games. And as you might expect in a review on a blog funded by Sony, the game funded by Sony does really quite well.

Heavenly Sword is amazing to behold!

Just to reiterate, that says "Heavenly Sword is amazing to behold, seriously addictive, pleasingly original, in that it manages not to feel like any other game you’ve played..."

Heavenly Sword - who knows?

Now we're not saying Heavenly Sword isn't the best thing in the world, ever, it could very well be, but having Sony-paid writers reviewing Sony games for a Sony web site is creating quite a large mockery of the games industry.

To the DEATH

OFFICIAL NEW ENEMY. Although, being professional, it's unlikely angry Three Speech staff will pile in here and call us cunts in the comments bit, so this may well be a bit of a one-sided confrontation.
Blogger Nick said...
" manages not to feel like any other game you’ve played..."

I downloaded the demo last week (Yes I have a PS3, sorry) and it consisted of a bit like in Shenmue where you press a direction button when told, and then a 'combat' bit was mashing 2 buttons like in every fighting game ever.
Blogger F said...
Surely this is no different to what official magazines have been doing since the beginning of time though.

wrktrd = work turd. says it all really
Blogger Mr Butterscotch said...
Well, it sounds quite a lot like God of War, what with the chain swords and the quick-time button presses.
Blogger cowbrain said...
David Jaffe will be turning on his high horse!
Blogger John said...
This is different from official magazines though, being it the PS3 and Sony trying to make it look completely un-gay, rather than Luigi's Mansion on the Gamecube scoring 93%

iqdmnit - a not-so-happy response to an IQ test
Blogger Jim said...

Check out the Heavenly Sword "advert" halfway down. "Ninja Formula..."
Blogger Michael Rossell said...
To be fair, Major Nelson has been doing the exact same thing for years.
Blogger Michael said...
Not really. For starters Major Nelson hasn't been reviwing Microsoft's own games - it's a new source, not a review source.

And those official mags PAY SONY for the right to use their name, not the other way around, so it's not like that either.

Nope, this is a bloke collecting a Sony paycheque writing a review for a Sony website on which he's 'reviewing' a Sony game.
Blogger Crap_Bag said...
Alternatively, you could sell your soul to the devil and start reviewing games for some poxy technology website, which hosts its videos on youtube...

Nice work Cmdr Zorg... "Social Retard"... the gimp behind the UK:R mask finally revealed!

Gary... go and get yourself laid... I'll even give you £50 for that rent boy you've always had your eye on!
Blogger Endemion said...
I like how this gets posted every other thread as if its some huge secret and Zorgs been hiding it all this time while leading us from the shadows like some wierd cult.

We know.

We don't care.

Why would we care?

Also surely it would only be relevant to this discussion if Zorg Was paided by Shiny to review products made by Shiny on a Shiny website.

Which he isn't.

As opposed to it showing he has been hired by a company due to his passion for and knowledge of games? (I guess, I may be making shit up now)
Blogger Crap_Bag said...

Blogger Chris said...

Pointing out spelling mistakes on the internet.

Blogger Halverde said...
Nobody called "Crap_Bag" can call anybody a tit.
Blogger Friday said...
Anonymous twat attacks someone on internet for not err not being anonymous. Not content with that alone, for irony bonus then accuses someone else of being a tit.

I'll quite happily have that fifty quid and the rent boy if they are going free. I'm sure I can find a use for both.
Blogger Endemion said...
Oh noes!

I made a spelling mistake while typing something quickly on a blog early in the morning, maybe now I won't pass my final exams on my new super easy "Blog Skills" GNVQ!


shdopru - The new thing to replace Sudoku's
Blogger ThwartedEfforts said...
I've just found out that if you click the little disabled badge next to the word verification, it automatically appends a weak and unfunny retort to your message. Crap_bag must have been subconsciously drawn to the image of a spaz in a wheelchair and, with a simple involuntary twitch, gave the impression he's a complete prick. I'm sure that he is in fact not a complete prick, and is composing a devilishly witty response as we speak. I don't know about you but I'm going to wait and find out what it is!
Blogger H Dryly said...
The 'Blog Skillz' GNVQ is spelled with a Z. Retards like words spelled with Z. Hence 'Vids' and 'Bitz'.
Blogger Michael Rossell said...
Michael said: "Not really. For starters Major Nelson hasn't been reviwing Microsoft's own games - it's a new source, not a review source."

Check out Major Nelson's about section: "I run this blog as part of my passion for community. I run this blog on my own time, and with my own money. It’s important to note that what I say on this blog (including any podcasts) is my personal opinion and is not read or approved by anyone before it is posted."

Of course, can you remember the last time he was honestly critical of Microsoft's approach? Link me please, because I don't recall any such instances!

Why? Because he's paid by Microsoft, he says nice things about Microsoft while pretending to be an "unofficial" source.

Same for the UK wannabe, Aceybongos: "The views on this blog are mine and mine only."

Whatever chaps, you live thanks to the money given to you by Microsoft, regardless of disclaimers, they never say anything bad about MS!
Blogger Malefic said...
I've completed Heavenly Sword twice today. You can do 100% of the game in about 6 hours, and you'll want to get 100% to seeing Andy Serkis poncing about in a mo-cap suit.

5 years work and it comes down to about two and a half hours of play to complete, wouldn't be spending my hard earned groats on that.

I'll be honest the graphics are pretty nice for a PS3 game, but then I saw the Bioshock demo.
Blogger Jawatron said...
Can we go back to calling Crap_Bag a sony rent boy?
Blogger Resident said...
Did you guys snag that screen-grab before they edited the title? Otherwise, someone's been shoppin'.

There's a "P" in there. The "P" stands for "Pretty sure the game isn't out yet."
Blogger Cmdr_Zorg said...
There was no Photoshopping, that's been changed by THEM.
Blogger Jawatron said...
Blogger The Dog said...
They've started deleting comments they don't like as well, my first one vanished just because I said it was a poor attempt at next gen gaming if, in a fighting adventure game, you CAN'T JUMP.

Then again, what do you expect from Sony and the cow population?

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