This was sent in by "Will". It's from Zelda. It means something like Dreamcast 2 is coming and SEGA's going to buy Nintendo with all the money it's made from doing Sonic & Mario.
This is from one of our 2.7 million readers called "Chris". It's of a Dreamcast logo on a man's URBAN VEST JUMPER COAT HYBRID, as featured on a web site for Sony's ultra-poor Rolly MP3-playing robot twat. It means that SEGA is buying Sony with all the money it's made from doing Sonic & Mario and basing Dreamcast 2 around the Cell architecture.
This is from "Joe". It's of a lamp. This means SEGA will be exclusively marketing and releasing Dreamcast 2 through IKEA.
This is from "Sam". It's something he saw in Costa Coffee. This means Sam has yet to be impacted upon by the credit crunch and still thinks spending £2.55 on a cup of coffee and a further £3.75 on a toasted ciabatta is an acceptable way to behave.
This is from "Waqas". It's of some bins. Waqas needs to get a new phone with a better camera VERY URGENTLY.
This is from "Tim". He spotted it during Doctor Who. The golden era of when Billie Piper was in it.
Tim wisely supplied a close-up of Billie's face. If you want a nice, hi-res promotional photo of Billie Piper, there's one here - we obtained it under slightly false pretences by pretending it was for illustrating proper news.
A site about games and game paraphernalia and how nothing's as good as we remember it, probably because we used to inhabit a FANTASY WORLD.
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MICRO-BLOG
What are we half-heartedly skimming RIGHT NOW? RECENTLY...
Each post .02% worse than the last. THINGS HAVE REACHED CRITICAL MASS! UPDATE: MARGINALLY NEW ANGLES AND POSES OF ALISON ... PRETEND LARA CROFT EXTENDS PRETENDING CONTRACT INT... "WE CHEER" CHEERLEADER PHOTOS FOR EDITORIAL USE ANTI-CHARITY UPDATE: HELP YOURSELF ONLY BY GETTING... SEGA OF AUSTRALIA DOING ITS BIT FOR CHARITY "QUICK, DAVE! GET THE CAMERA!" LAST-GEN ENEMIES ALSO DOING BADLY
THE HTML ERAS
When men used to till the pages by hand. |
SHOPS
Use our Play or Amazon Shops to buy those shit Wii games you secretly like, helping the effort. ARCHIVES
12 years of wheat and chaff in one vast and impenetrable mass. |
Some updates weren't universally hated by the entire world within seconds of being uploaded.
1. The Animal Crossing Wild World mega-feature and public-service review
2. Sonic CD - screenshot parade
3. Cream The Rabbit sexual diagrams
4. OutRun2 screenshot-taking guide for the benefit of inept journalists
5. The personal UKR SEGA Toys Homestar planetarium review
6. Trying to buy an Xbox 360 in London
7. (STILL) THE MOST AMAZING PROMOTIONAL PHOTOGRAPH OF ALL TIME
8. A trip to GamesMaster (in Peckham)
Links to that blog of yours you started up and were excited about for a whole weekend.
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FRIENDS
Some people we might've MET. Or at least seen in a room and been near. One Thousand Tiny Things I Hate "LIFESTYLE"
Other sites we are happy to officially endorse without requiring Adwords spend. PRIVACY POLICY
Having one is compulsory, apparently. Ours is here. It is not meant to be funny. |
ACQUAINTANCES
People off the internet. Quality and commitment levels may vary. |
It came with the template. Maybe in 2014 we'll jump on board the Twitter train and put that in here. Or a radio. That'd be nice.
It's a bodywarmer! Admittedly, they're a bit shit and faddish but come on! You know what they are.
The symbolism of that last Billie Piper photo is flagrantly apparent; she is turning her back on Dreamcast in disgust. With this indisputable evidence, I as part of the Sega Ayatollah decree that all of her crap roles in rubbish TV and her shit attempts at music ages ago be burned in the streets.
Another fatwa will be issued against Jonathon Ross, just because he's a total fuckwit.
The Ayatollah have spoken.
Also BTW it's a recession now. So now you're allowed to have 'Credit Crunch Nostalgia', i.e. "sigh, do you remember when all this was just a credit crunch"?
Why did most home made CITV stuff take place near a canal?
I like the idea of lumping ALL the swirl updates into one big update. Finally clear that arse infection with one hard strain.
I seem to remember they kept showing close-ups of her arse while she was walking. Brilliant.
wv: jokings
Still would though, pbviously.
Even though, as photoboy pointed out, she now probably has a twat like the tardis doors.
Of which she is coming out of in that hi-res pic, in some sort of chicken-egg conundrum. Oh, wait, it was an analogy, her twat isn't actually the tardis, or is it...
Lovely!
I wanted to make a post like 'What does God...actually... er... do?' and just string words together with no regard for grammar but their example was too good to top.
Thanks! :D It was entirely intentional of course.
*cough*
O and would the colored chick.
Now, 'stupid face' and 'Billie Piper' would be a perfectly good match.
@ "What does God... actually... er... do?"
Is that you Ellie?