A site about games and game paraphernalia and how nothing's as good as we remember it, probably because we used to inhabit a FANTASY WORLD.
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MICRO-BLOG
What are we half-heartedly skimming RIGHT NOW? RECENTLY...
Each post .02% worse than the last. THE CONTINUING ADVENTURES OF 'FLAG MAN' PICTURE OF A GIRL ON THE INTERNET WEARING A SONIC ... A COLLECTION OF SEGA GRAFFITI FROM THE MANCHESTER ... SEEING AS WE'RE POSTING LITERALLY ANYTHING THESE D... SEGA JAPAN HAS A YOUTUBE CHANNEL MAN GETS INCREASINGLY CLOSE TO CHAIR LIE SUPREMO DAVID REEVES LEAVES SONY
THE HTML ERAS
When men used to till the pages by hand. |
SHOPS
Use our Play or Amazon Shops to buy those shit Wii games you secretly like, helping the effort. ARCHIVES
12 years of wheat and chaff in one vast and impenetrable mass. |
Some updates weren't universally hated by the entire world within seconds of being uploaded.
1. The Animal Crossing Wild World mega-feature and public-service review
2. Sonic CD - screenshot parade
3. Cream The Rabbit sexual diagrams
4. OutRun2 screenshot-taking guide for the benefit of inept journalists
5. The personal UKR SEGA Toys Homestar planetarium review
6. Trying to buy an Xbox 360 in London
7. (STILL) THE MOST AMAZING PROMOTIONAL PHOTOGRAPH OF ALL TIME
8. A trip to GamesMaster (in Peckham)
Links to that blog of yours you started up and were excited about for a whole weekend.
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FRIENDS
Some people we might've MET. Or at least seen in a room and been near. One Thousand Tiny Things I Hate "LIFESTYLE"
Other sites we are happy to officially endorse without requiring Adwords spend. PRIVACY POLICY
Having one is compulsory, apparently. Ours is here. It is not meant to be funny. |
ACQUAINTANCES
People off the internet. Quality and commitment levels may vary. |
It came with the template. Maybe in 2014 we'll jump on board the Twitter train and put that in here. Or a radio. That'd be nice.
Zorg is sitting on a ROCK!
Brought to you by the Facebook Stalkers of Great Britain Society.
what a twist!!!
His neck now gives the illusion of being much longer than it most likely is. It’s pure speculation at this point but I’d wager that if we placed his photo side by side with that of a freshly shaven nut sack then a number of remarkable similarities would emerge.
Is there a name for this psychological deficit of 'looking at a picture of somebody and laughing at their shortcomings to boost your own self-esteem'? The nearest I could find was 'Victorian Freakshow-induced Schadenfreude', or 'misanthropic self-loathing'. What do you think? Maybe it should just be called 'Sad cunt's syndrome', not in honour of who discovered it, but those who suffer from it.
Love,
DR. Weatherbox.
How right you are Dr.Weatherbox, it is not big or clever for people to list others short coming to increase there own feeling of self worth. Truly our moral compass has no direction.
Or perhaps you are the scary man in this picture. When are ever going to move out of your mums house? Your 34! 34!! Get rid of your He-Man bed covers and move on.
He's only being made fun of because (1) He has a job, I don't. (2) He looks happy, I'm not. (3) I know I would, but I feel he would not reciprocate. (4) He looks like he can handle it.
If he's going to be seen at UK:R then he can take the punishment like the rest of us.
(5) Cover the right parts, and his face does bear a striking resemblance to a scrotum. No one has said this is a bad thing.
We are all doomed for sure. (An infinity loop which will result in a quantum cascade ripping apart the very fabric of space & time. Make good with your maker, it's the end of the universe!
So, er.. WeatherBox, - since it's the end of existence & all that, - fancy massaging my tiny, limp penis? I'll even let you put it in you mouth if you like.
I was criticising those who had designed to ordain themselves as abritrators of beauty and the upholding of 'looking normal'. I admit, no criticism is particularly productive, but I think it's better to criticise bumholes like you lot rather than a man who had the 'temerity' to look like somebody and have his picture taken to be submitted on the internet. There are critics in every field, and yes, life is an endless chain of infinitely regressive and accumulating metaphorical figuration of variegated and socio-political, cultural definitions of 'favourable/unfavourable', that ain't no suprise. The quest for being 'genuine' is predicated for many upon an pious and antiquated notion of human distinction between 'holy' and 'sinful', and as for beauty? Well, if you're happy to have your sensibilities cultivated by mass media representations of what is desirable, that's fine by me, but you're a poo bum for it, says I, and I think you're a cunt too.
As for my ego, well, yes. I am driven by my ego. What drives you, The Holy Spirit?
I only really said it to cause a stir, and right now, I'm casuing another stir. No doubt people will pick this to pieces and call me a pretentious winkle, and I am really. I didn't want to go this far, but I have to start what I finished, otherwise I might get 'verbal constipation'.
I say we string him up.
Or worship him as our new god. Either/or, really.
String him up.
And then worship him.
Don't see why we have to choose one over the other.
However, I mainly agree with Weatherbox, but I didn't understand this bit, anyone want a crack at deconstructing it?
"The quest for being 'genuine' is predicated for many upon an pious and antiquated notion of human distinction between 'holy' and 'sinful'."
My opener for ten is that I doubt many individuals of the UK:R readership refer to any kind of theological edifice in order to define themselves; so whilst this critism may apply to some I think they will mainly not be reading it here.
Also people don't choose their own perceptual standards of beauty, they are conditioned into them. So, while I think that the mass media definition of beauty is a) terrifyingly uniform, b) cynically evolved to sell products and c) more misogynist then it's ever been before, at the same time I like my naked women to be non-mingers and I'll bet Weatherbox does too.
and... that's it for Friday lunchtime. It's been great, cheers.
I'm neither egotistical nor religious. What motivates me is unique to me as it is to anyone. The fact that you're driven by your ego clearly shows you have low self-esteem. Do you relate to him because you feel the whole world's against you? As for the small-penis fixation... Well, I'm sure you can work it out. (no pun intended)
"Conclusion: He's just a man. In a picture. There's no need to be mean. Is that an unreasonable position to hold?" - Not at all. However; we all make judgements & appreciations everyday. When we choose to voice it, we decide the manner in which we do so. Just like 'you' chose the manner in which you voiced your 'observations.'
I don't think you're a cunt.
_
Shit, there goes the lunchtime wank window...
@Anon - I think when weatherbox said he was motiovated by his ego, I think he was meaning in the literal sense, meaning 'as opposed to being motivated by his id'. Of course, I may be writing too much into it, but then the pretentious winkle angle has already been raised twice.
Conclusion: Relax & make some nob jokes. You'll feel better for it.
Yeah, more nob jokes.
I would of done but all the big words ruined the moment for me. Which is probably for the best as my cock "is the length and girth of a prize winning marrow". And would have probably hurt him quite alot
As for nob jokes, I flipping love nob jokes. I've got nob jokes coming out of my ears. Well, in truth, I only have nobs coming out of my ears, because I've just been skullfucked in each eye by NATO soldiers and their genitalia ruptured my cranium from within, leaving through my ears. It was very sexy indeed.
I love nob jokes so much I even trained my nob to tell them. It's kind of like self-referential, self-effacing comedy, like that comedian REM wrote a song about. Maybe I should contact REM and see if they would write a song about my nob? Actually, I don't think I will because REM are shit.
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My friend can't raise his winkle full stop. Pretentious or otherwise.
http://www.laineygossip.com/pics/robert%20p%201%20apr08.jpg
Please feel free to belittle my shortcomings.
... and that's it. I haven't the heart to go on.
I'm driven by the knowledge that if I stop I won't carry on.
Are you THE Glen!? Of UK:R fame?! If so, I'm messaging you and that makes me famous by osmosis!!!
and I may have a small penis, but....err, damn, I have a small penis :(