"I was walking around the part of town that is known for street art and what have you when I came across this and almost shat a brick or five. I made everyone I was with come to a freaking halt and wait on my overly caffeinated and giddy self so I could take teh piczors you now have. Anyways hope you enjoy and all that lovely crap. Your friendly neighbourhood Sir Kittens" - Sir Kittens.
A site about games and game paraphernalia and how nothing's as good as we remember it, probably because we used to inhabit a FANTASY WORLD.
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MICRO-BLOG
What are we half-heartedly skimming RIGHT NOW? RECENTLY...
Each post .02% worse than the last. MAN AND MACHINE IN PERFECT HARMONY HIDEO KOJIMA'S NEW GAME - REVEALED PLAYSTATION ASSOCIATED WITH... INTERNATIONAL ORGAN... HOME MADE SONIC HEROES "TUNIC" SUBLIMINAL DREAMCAST REFERENCE SPOTTED IN "QUIRKY"... Dr ROBOTNIK'S INGREDIENTS REVEALED TODAY'S HALF-HEARTED PHOTO OF A THING THAT SAYS "S... MAN GETS INCREMENTALLY CLOSER TO SEGA VISION
THE HTML ERAS
When men used to till the pages by hand. |
SHOPS
Use our Play or Amazon Shops to buy those shit Wii games you secretly like, helping the effort. ARCHIVES
12 years of wheat and chaff in one vast and impenetrable mass. |
Some updates weren't universally hated by the entire world within seconds of being uploaded.
1. The Animal Crossing Wild World mega-feature and public-service review
2. Sonic CD - screenshot parade
3. Cream The Rabbit sexual diagrams
4. OutRun2 screenshot-taking guide for the benefit of inept journalists
5. The personal UKR SEGA Toys Homestar planetarium review
6. Trying to buy an Xbox 360 in London
7. (STILL) THE MOST AMAZING PROMOTIONAL PHOTOGRAPH OF ALL TIME
8. A trip to GamesMaster (in Peckham)
Links to that blog of yours you started up and were excited about for a whole weekend.
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FRIENDS
Some people we might've MET. Or at least seen in a room and been near. One Thousand Tiny Things I Hate "LIFESTYLE"
Other sites we are happy to officially endorse without requiring Adwords spend. PRIVACY POLICY
Having one is compulsory, apparently. Ours is here. It is not meant to be funny. |
ACQUAINTANCES
People off the internet. Quality and commitment levels may vary. |
It came with the template. Maybe in 2014 we'll jump on board the Twitter train and put that in here. Or a radio. That'd be nice.
There is no consistency on this site. Excluding knowing that every update will be pathetic and every one will have an Egg Monroe comment underneath.
She feared that if she crisped her orange panties with femspoo, the crinkling noise would attract the enemy.
Against all her instincts, she reached down and attempted to remove the eggs. A warm feeling was spreading across her body, her arms were beginning to shake. Time was running out.
Her hands found the battery pack strapped to her leg. Unfortunately, her wrist brushed her crotch, slightly shifting the eggs within. They shifted to an even more pleasurable position, and a new wave of delights swept over her. Her fumbling fingers, coordination gone, slipped against the battery pack and activated the anti-tampering sensor Pudding had installed.
However, the torrents of juice now spilling from Ulala's vagina shorted the hastily wired sensor and instead switched the eggs into overdrive.
Ulala's eyes rolled back in her head, her knees buckled underneath her and she slumped to the floor with a gasping squeak.
Ok, you can stop now.
http://bayimg.com/gApnHaAbo
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v289/baepic/EggMonroe.jpg
I know we aren't suppose to talk about it, but Project Mayhem is gonna be awesome. Those Sony pricks won't know what's hit 'em.
If he's not mixing with his mp3 decks or riding a tiny tricycle round Hoxton, of course.
as brooker said "mankind is doomed!!"
WF: GnomeGore - wtf!!!!
Good bye.
wv: sylut - OUTER SPACE SLUT
Oh yeah, and PlayStation owners. Just to be on the safe side I'll 'top' me self too. There, I think that covers it.
Whether (no pun intended) it's you or not, I completely agree. Stop being whinging (the Aussies are having a field day) hateful cunts. You, erm.. cunts.
My names Anonymous, and I totally endorse his message.
@anonymous - no, that isn't me although I agree wholeheartedly with the message. 'Rock on motherfuck' etc. That said, I'm not demanding new material, but I am encouraging it. I haven't looked at vaguely nostalgic upholstery for far too long now, Zorg. Help us.
ALSO HER NAMES EGG MONROE SHES OLDER
However, I'd have just a bit more respect if he/she/egg bothered to post under their regular username, rather than hiding behind the Anonymous facade - another cancer of the internet world.
If you need material:
Google images for sega.
Go to page 3.
Outrun 2 related image with LARGE BREASTED women:
http://www.skegnesslaserquest.com/ATEI/Sega%20Girls%20and%20Outrun%20SP.JPG
P.S. I went to Skegness Laser Quest in about '91
Well, less "bang the shit out of" and more "nervously talk to."
Well, less "nervously talk to" and more "don't make eye contact as I walk past and hope I can accurately remember how she looks for the tearful tugjob when I get home"
the end is nigh
I too agree entirely with Anon's rant earlier. I think most of you are just taking your pent-up anger and frustration out (unfairly) on Sir Kittens. He should be applauded for contributing to this site. Instead of waving your torches and pitch-forks, why don't you take a long hard look at yourself. Should you find something you don't like then for your sake, do something about it. There's no need to project your own feeling of inadequacies onto someone who thought he'd share something with like-minded people.
As for our good Zorg.. In all the years he's worked in this industry, I'm sure he has seen it and heard it all before and no doubt have a pile of t-shirts. He will have developed a very thick skin. But eventually all the negativity will begin to permeate.
I still think lack of material equates to lack of update. Perhaps he's just taking a long Bank Holiday weekend break; And we should all follow his example by logging off and going outside to explore the real world.
So whatever you're doing and wherever you may be, I wish you all well.
Blaming the Jews is so passé.
I blame the cripples.
Can we bring this back, please?
It must have been at least a year since we last saw an Emily Booth update. This just will not do, Zorg!
Let's talk some more about how "shit" or "shit but free so stop complaining" UK:R is these days.
Christ I've been so stupid - and what's worse, I've been capitalist, too. For Cliff's sake, I should stop cocking going on about the internet being free AND rubbish at the same time and switch off my Maynard Keynes themed LCD monitor, go into the wonderful Marxist outside and do something less boring instead like re-collectivising the Ukraine.
So I'm going out now to beat Sir Kittens (or egg monroe, it's all the same) to a bloody pulp with a framed picture of Mrs Thatcher wrapped up in a post-ironic Pacman courier bag. Two victories for the proletariat for the price of one (in as much as price has any meaning, except as part of the continuous dialectic struggle).
Please update UK:R! Just look at what happens in the comments when nothing new is posted on the front page...
If you need material:
Google images for sega.
Go to page 3.
Outrun 2 related image with LARGE BREASTED women:
http://www.skegnesslaserquest.com/ATEI/Sega%20Girls%20and%20Outrun%20SP.JPG
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I'll just pretend that was the article. Good article btw.
Jet Set Radio's Gum
To summarise: Wouldn't. Cube is the girl for me.
I offer for your amusement and perusement: http://www.sonicthehedgefund.com/
http://www.molecular-cancer.com/content/8/1/12
http://www.christianmarcuslyons.com/Canines2.html (Have fun spotting the tenuous SEGA link!)
Flowers are a good idea (sorry). Don't worry about a card - despite the honesty of the statement, writing "Here, I hope you like the gerbera bouquet, please will you take it in the back passage for me?" in blue byro never seems to get a lady onside. Not even one who's wearing a black crop top.
Failing flowers, bring any spray cans you've got lying around - she doesn't seem to be able to carry many at once and is always running out just as Captain Onishima comes charging up, intent on handcuffing and 'interrogating' her in a windowless cell.
The perv.
I was very excited about SEGA endorsed investment opportunities, however when I tried to log in by typing in my Visa number / expiry date, and using the verification code as the password, but it didn't work.
It must be a fake!