This is such good news it can't wait until April's spiral round-up and MUST be given the publicity it deserves. Especially as Chris wrote lots of words, making this look like an update we spent 20 minutes on rather than five.
You might need to turn the contrast on your screen up a bit.
"I was cleaning my glasses the other night and, even though I've worn them for about five months, noticed for the first time that they have little Dreamcast logos on them. This instantly makes my glasses Cool As Fuck(TM) and means I can see in Segavision."
"I've taken a photo of them on top of a dictionary. It's not my dictionary but at least it proves I have at least one friend who knows how to spell words. It also gives a fantastic sense of scale: in this case, proving that these Dreamglasses are roughly the same size as a 'normal' pair of human glasses."
"I shouldn't be sharing this secret because I want the power all to myself, but the glasses were made by i-spax, who are German, and the product code, handily written on the glasses themselves, is JACOB-52/17-col.7 so if anyone wants a pair they should thrust that information in their optician's scab-encrusted face and demand he orders them before he gets raped in a way he couldn't possibly have imagined when he rode to work that morning on his pathetically underpowered bicycle."
"I have also attached an image of a Sonic toy that I got from a capsule machine at a service station, who is pictured thumbing that cunt from Little Big Planet up the arse. Cheers" - Chris.
A site about games and game paraphernalia and how nothing's as good as we remember it, probably because we used to inhabit a FANTASY WORLD.
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MICRO-BLOG
What are we half-heartedly skimming RIGHT NOW? RECENTLY...
Each post .02% worse than the last. PLAYSTATION3 ASSOCIATED WITH... MURDER! "SONIC RAP" BY THE ADVENTURES OF DUANE AND BRANDO WOULD YOU TRUST THIS MAN TO BALANCE THE ONLINE FEA... THE FINGERS OF A FEMALE MEDICAL STUDENT THAT 'WERESONIC' THING IN A VAGUELY COMPROMISING P... GLEN BRAVELY GETS UP OFF HIS STOOL, BLINKING AWAY ... SONIC THE HEDGEHOG "SQUEEZE TOYS" WE CAN KEEP THIS UP FOR AT LEAST ANOTHER MONTH MAN BRAVELY "FOLLOWS THROUGH" WITH IDEA
THE HTML ERAS
When men used to till the pages by hand. |
SHOPS
Use our Play or Amazon Shops to buy those shit Wii games you secretly like, helping the effort. ARCHIVES
12 years of wheat and chaff in one vast and impenetrable mass. |
Some updates weren't universally hated by the entire world within seconds of being uploaded.
1. The Animal Crossing Wild World mega-feature and public-service review
2. Sonic CD - screenshot parade
3. Cream The Rabbit sexual diagrams
4. OutRun2 screenshot-taking guide for the benefit of inept journalists
5. The personal UKR SEGA Toys Homestar planetarium review
6. Trying to buy an Xbox 360 in London
7. (STILL) THE MOST AMAZING PROMOTIONAL PHOTOGRAPH OF ALL TIME
8. A trip to GamesMaster (in Peckham)
Links to that blog of yours you started up and were excited about for a whole weekend.
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FRIENDS
Some people we might've MET. Or at least seen in a room and been near. One Thousand Tiny Things I Hate "LIFESTYLE"
Other sites we are happy to officially endorse without requiring Adwords spend. PRIVACY POLICY
Having one is compulsory, apparently. Ours is here. It is not meant to be funny. |
ACQUAINTANCES
People off the internet. Quality and commitment levels may vary. |
It came with the template. Maybe in 2014 we'll jump on board the Twitter train and put that in here. Or a radio. That'd be nice.
I wonder if he's got a body to show underneath that zip of his.
Sonic can also be considered a 'SackBoy' when he whips his cock and balls out and slaps everyone in the face with his testicles.