UK:RESISTANCE 'main page'
We have received an email from a man who MADE CONTACT with Richard Jacques. He told Richard what to do - and Richard did it. It's a good story we are pleased to publish for your amusement, even though it starts off in a vaguely insulting fashion.

OPENING PREAMBLE
"I've been saving this until I thought UK:R reaches the bottom, the very bottom, the 'touch it it's concrete can't go lower than this' bottom, so now it's time to release it and hopefully bring a ray of Super Sonic (from the good old days) yellow sunshine into the 'community' members lives... if only just for a moment, before we quickly realise life is grey again.

"I was so impressed with MS:R's soundtrack, I used my toned research (stalking) skills to find His Royal Holiness Richard Jacques' home address. I sent him my MS:R manual and case cover slip with a letter asking him if he wouldn't mind autographing them, being the wholesome SEGA kind-of-guy I am I of course included an envelope addressed to me with postage already stamped on."


'Lift your shirt up'

"Knowing that if he had enough spare time from doing whatever musical Gods do on their evenings, I'd have a new family heirloom, and as such I didn't want him to scribble all over the front so I sent him the SPECIFIC instructions to 'please autograph the car bonnet on the cover slip 'To Jonathan, From Richard Jacques' and the bonnet on the manual 'Richard Jacques''. Yes, giving instructions to such a legend did evoke feelings not too distant from those Buffalo Bill must have felt in Silence of the Lambs: 'The Richard will take the oil, and rub it over his body'."


'Hold it open for me'

"It's such a rush knowing that I can touch something that has not only been inside Richard's house, but has also been touched with the same hands used to craft 'Club Paris', 'Holding On', 'Am I only Dreaming' and the greats from Sonic R (ie. all of them)" - Jonathan.


WHAT WE WOULD TELL RICHARD TO DO
  • Touch it for a bit
  • Hold it tighter
  • Put it in
  • STOP CRYING NO ONE CAN HEAR YOU SO JUST DO IT
  • Anonymous Postumo said...
    Retro
    Anonymous Anonymous said...
    Best story I've read on UKR for a LONG time, awesome!
    Blogger Ino said...
    This reminds me of the times when my day would actually improve after reading UK:R

    I'll even throw in the captcha!!!
    WV: coutin
    Blogger bilal said...
    I was wondering how cool it would be to also have an autographed MSR front sheet thing, so:

    http://www.bilalsheikh.co.uk/ukresistance/msr_autographed.jpg

    Just print it out and put it in your MSR box and YOU TOO can have an autographed MSR front sheet thing.
    Anonymous Carr said...
    Awesome, I can now fake cheques from Richard Jacques.

    "To Carr, thanks for last night - £200"
    Anonymous Anonymous said...
    awesome! i can write pretend autographs from other people too!
    Blogger JoeMDesign said...
    MS:R?

    Metropolis Street: Racer?

    As opposed to Metropolis Street: Fighter?

    Eh?
    Anonymous Jonathan said...
    MS:R is the way Richard wrote it on his note back to me, therefore that is the correct way.

    I didn't question the almighty so I don't know if there is/was/will be an MS:S MS:T MS:U e.t.c
    Blogger Deejay said...
    The most outstanding choon on the whole soundtrack was the menu theme. It was immense!
    Anonymous Ted Tedderton said...
    I hate Richard Jax.
    Blogger bilal said...
    Yeah, the menu song was amazingness. It even took away the lame wtf feeling of having to SET THE FUCKING CLOCK before getting started with the actual game.
    Blogger Tomleecee said...
    Menu song: Brilliant. Not being able to load my save file because it's 50Hz and now I have a VGA set up: Wank.
    Blogger JoeMDesign said...
    "MS:R is the way Richard wrote it on his note back to me, therefore that is the correct way."

    Then it MUST be so!

    Anyone else get the bugged version at first? I failed race after race but got to the next level anyway. That was weird.

    wv: orogym... a gym... for oro's.
    Anonymous kern said...
    Nice reading Jonathan
    Blogger Multiverse said...
    Looks like the campaign of unwanted attention is starting to have an affect on the old chap. I don't consider it a coincidence that he wrote it as MS:R, seen as this site is UK:R.

    Is this some sort of watershed moment? Who knows? Who cares? Who wants to share a bath with me?
    Blogger Badben said...
    Never mind all this, IT isn't working! What should I DO???????
    Blogger Cmdr_Zorg said...
    Let's all get in the bath with Multiverse. I'll bring some fresh razor blades.
    Anonymous itsgood2slide said...
    Following Richard's performance at Game City in Nottingham, we were told that you would be available for a chat in a tea room shortly afterwards. I scoured the city's game shops for a copy of MS:R, but I had to settle for Outrun 2006, which he was happy to sign for me.
    Anonymous Andrew said...
    I drive one of those cars, but mine is blue. I wonder if I could get him to autograph the bonnet.
    Anonymous Neil said...
    "put it in", fantastic. i hope this is meant in the slightly oo-err way and not the "put it in your dreamcast" way. oh UKR. you did it again.

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