UK:RESISTANCE 'main page'
So this is what's gone wrong with Sony. They're all on very strong drugs.

Flower: Will blossom into a CANCEROUS GROWTH

At least the flower isn't saying "HOLY SHIT!" and shooting other grey flowers in a grey space corridor. This sort of thing could turn us.
Blogger P.P.A. said...
That's awesome! Flowers and plants in general are pro.
Too bad these don't seem to come out of destroyed robots. And they don't bloom on metal either.
Blogger Grytpype said...
Why not just go outside? At least in generic space shooter number 700 it's offering me something I can't literally do myself.
Blogger Mentalist-air said...
At least they're not taking the sonic game we'd been dreaming of for years, and ruined it, just like every other sonic games for the last 12 years or so:
Blogger colin said...
Mentailist-Air said:
At least they're not taking the sonic game we'd been dreaming of for years, and ruined it, just like every other sonic games for the last 12 years or so:

And it is now time, my brothers. Sony has fallen, and there is now only one obstacle in the way of the second great days of Sega: Sega itself! This treason cannot stand. A Sonic with Rayman arms? A Sonic with Streets of Rage gameplay, while Streets of Rage lies cold in the ground? Sonic walking on all fours like an animal! Not on my watch!

Here's what you do. Buy the game and play it all the way through. Then, once you've enjoyed the 2D parts as much as you can, break the disc in half and send one broken half to Sega along with a note. The note needs to read:
"Yeah, this part of the disc doesn't work. Some kind of manufacturing defect seems to make it run slow, ugly, and retarded. Please fill this half up with 2D gameplay and send it back to me."

If you are living somewhere where there is a "Movie Gallery" rental outlet this will be very cheap. They sell 25 cent damage protection and claim that, if you have it, even if the disc is broken in half when they get it back you don't have to pay for it. Rent the game, pay the extra 25 cents, break the game, send it to Sega, tell "Movie Gallary" your DVD caught fire and burned the disc in half, and the other half is melted. That way you embarrass Sega and hurt the stupid "Damage insurance" business model.
Blogger Remote_ said...

This just about does it for me. I'm now officially giving up being a Sonic fanboy. I've waited in vain for years and I'm just getting too fucking old to wait any longer.

Blogger Grytpype said...
Sonic hasn't been good since... Green Hill Zone.
Blogger Apples and Oranges said...
"Here's what you do. Buy the game and play it all the way through. Then, once you've enjoyed the 2D parts as much as you can, break the disc in half and send one broken half to Sega along with a note."


Not to be a nuissance, I think Sonic Unleashed will be nice to play. We'll see. I'm not horrified at all.

And you people shouldn't go to Kotaku for Sega news. That's the most biased thing against Sega that I've ever seen.
Blogger mrplow said...
grey sky in games
Blogger Alex said...
Hey, remember back when Sega made games about hummingbirds?

Neither do I.
Blogger P.P.A. said...
@Alex: Thanks for reminding me that I still need to get Kolibri for 32X.
Blogger P.P.A. said...


Blogger Tomas said...
If P.P.A. has seen it too, that means I didn't hallucinate it

The world is doomed
Blogger Gutter Press said...
Where has Swill Man gone? I want Swill Man back.
Blogger Nebular_uk said...
This post has been removed by the author.
Blogger Nebular_uk said...
That was almost good however the use of capital letters was required and appropriate. 0 out of 10, bring back swillman we want more capital letters, more post about something you bought on ebay, more misjudging your audience and being excessivly American.

If swillman is not back by next sunday iam going to take a shit in my sega master system and use it assault Richard Jacques. Or alternatly I may do absoloutly nothing.

cowlaryc: Lary Clarke he is a cow dont you know
Blogger Grytpype said...
You could assault Richard Jacques with your Master System and then do a shit on him. No point wasting energy.

Word verification: twazd. I don't know what it means but it made me smile, which is the happiest I get these days.
Blogger Nebular_uk said...
Thank you for your advice Grytpype but I have planned it out. It is going to be a drive by style attack me and Gutter press would fire up the low rider crank up the JSRF mix tape and waste Jacques, hurling a shit laden master system and him on his way back from somerfield.

You can film it and post it on youtube if you like. Guy Ritchie or Uwe Boll will probably make a film about it if we kill him. I would probably be played by Jason Stratham, Gutter press would be Tom Cruise and you would probably be Danny Dyer as the budget probably would not run to the extra $30 million required to get Will Smith.

wkbak: The word of the devil
Blogger lmaonoob said...
Hey guys, I've been going through your archives to burn time at work...WHERE'S ALL THE NUDITY GONE?! bring back eotw! ...please?
Blogger Simon said...
I got a PS3 free with a mobile phone deal. It came with a free "game" called GT5 prologue and a free film on bluray - Spiderman 3. Is this the right forum to pronounce on the imminent death of the PS3? Blu-ray is an overrated technology not noticeably better than upscaled DVD (playing on a 37" 1080P panel). GT5-P is just plain boring, and is simply blown away by the fun you can have with Mario Kart. A casual look through the racks of PS3 games in Gamestation hasn't alerted me to anything that isn't grey or would not be played by 15 year old socially incompetent losers from mid-west USA.

Really, someone help me. Is there any game worth buying on it or should I flog it on ebay? Someone on here mentioned Uncharted once. I guess I could give that a go.
Blogger Cunzy11 said...
Pikmin? When the fuck will the Xbox360 and the PS3 stop trying to be the Wii*. Just stick to car games and games about guns and leave the other shit to Nintendo.

*Yeah, they are real people.
Blogger lmaonoob said...
Metal gear solid's 'quite good' (huge understatement), so's resistance and there's some good 3rd party ones. Oh, and turn off the driving aids... Much more fun lol especially in the r8. I disagree you can tell, 28 days later is a good one to try on blu ray and so's casino royal.

I await the hate lol
Blogger Allan said...
> Metal gear solid's 'quite good' (huge understatement),

Blogger Alex said...
The PS3 isn't THAT bad guys. MGS4 is a great game (though if you want to play a good Kojima game without having to touch a Sony product, just play Snatcher instead) and GT5:P is a great racing sim with more content than most complete games (although they are an acquired taste, to say the least).

Past that though, there's nothing else worth getting for the PS3, unless you like gray shooters or Talladega Nights on Blu-Ray.
Blogger colin said...
MGS4 isn't a great game. Sonic the Hedgehog 2 is a great game. Shining Force is a great game. Revenge of Shinobi is a great game. Joust is a great game. Robotron 2084 is an incredible game. Gunstar Heroes is a really, really great game. MGS4 is some modern gaming cinematic piece of fluff made for people who aren't any good at anything. You want a great game, pay $5 for an old Genesis and pick up Comix Zone for $3. Or pick up an Atari 7800 for $15 and Joust for $5 in a shrink wrapped box. Want to take a huge ass dicking from the people who turned games into crap? Pay $400 to watch a movie about an old man soldier that lets you press the buttons once every 3 hours or so.
Blogger Alex said...
Kojima's ruined gaming? To the contrary; he's one of the few people who still makes good games. He's up there with Suzuki and Naka in my book.

And just for the record, Sonic 3 & Knuckles > Sonic 2.
Blogger colin said...
Alex said:
And just for the record, Sonic 3 & Knuckles > Sonic 2.

Alex, I'm not going to be hard on you, because it's bad enough nature cursed you with a name with an x in it. But Whichever Sonic Genesis game (or games) are the best is beside the point. They are all great.

Kojima is a fine movie producer. He makes nice little grind house style action movies (little plot, big explosions, stupid dialog). I am wondering what games he has made though? I can't say I've seen one since Snatcher.

I think his Wikipedia article says it all regarding both his "ability" as a story teller, and the general level of his fans' ability to make any sense:

"His games often revolve around contemporary issues such as nuclear terrorism, the effects of war, Illuminati-style organisations, human emotion, passing the torch onto the next generation, genetic engineering, manipulation of the masses, and the growth of private military contractors."

Yes, contemporary issues like "human emotion" and the "Illuminati." Some of his other contemporary issues include the war of 1812 and "thought." The contemporary writer Plato shares his interest in manipulation of the masses.
Blogger Alex said...
I find it ironic that Sega fans of all people are judging a game based on it's subject matter. Last I checked, games about Japanese youth fighting sailors to find an ancient mirror aren't exactly the epitome of storytelling either. But did that stop Shenmue (and the far superior sequel, Shenmue 2) from being one of the best games of it's time?

Besides, you shouldn't get too angry about a few million people liking a great game with a campy anime inspired plot. If anything, you should worry about the 20 million+ who think the epitome of gaming is a fat plumber in overalls and swinging pieces of plastic around to replicate real life activities.
Blogger Shaun said...
Snatcher? Do you mean on the old megacd? I have the console but only have the game on emulator, i'm sure there's a's either it being rare or not in PAL or i'm possibly talking out my arse and stole it because I couldn't be arsed with ebay lol anyway, i'd be lying if I didn't think it's a great game with a superior plot, but the metal gear series is still fantastic and i think some of you are just bitter because of your bias against sony.
Blogger Reihn said...
Wow. It's just like a regular ol' UR:K thread, only a whole group of posters have sprouted leaves and roots and are plants!

Fuck off you pathetic dickwads, go have scripted conversations with each other about sony products in some other corner of the internet.
Blogger Shaun said...
grow up lol
Blogger colin said...
Reihn said:
Wow. It's just like a regular ol' UR:K thread, only a whole group of posters have sprouted leaves and roots and are plants!

I don't know, if they were plants wouldn't they be going on about things besides Metal Gear 4: The Movie? Wouldn't they talk about something that Sony fans weren't already throwing into every conversation with the word "game" in it? I can't wait until MGS4 doesn't quite sell enough to pay for all the cut scenes they had to make, so it gets announced for the 360, and then Sony fans have nothing to talk about again.

Microsoft did just announce a movie deal with Netflicks, so it's possible they could deliver MGS4 that way. It's not like it's a game, where you have to deal with all that "playing it instead of watching it" bother.

Back on topic, if they were plants wouldn't they be trying to pretend Lair was good? Or GT5 Prologue was a real game? Or was fun? Or wouldn't they be going on about how "revolutionary" "Home" was going to be when it releases in 2024?
Blogger Alex said...
Did you forget to take your meds or something colin? You're being awfully rambunctious and it's making me smile.

Way to make generalizations about people too; I don't care for Sony, but they've managed to make the best platform this generation (which really isn't saying much, all things considered) and there's more for the PS3 that I want than any other current platform. It's a purely platonic relationship; if SCEI died tomorrow, I could care less.

The PS3 has MGS4, GT5, BlazBlue and Initial D Extreme Stage; all exclusive and all games I like. And since Sony isn't ran by an Illuminati of Jews that did 9/11, I can actually play imported copies of the latter two if they never see a US release.
Blogger Apples and Oranges said...
This post has been removed by the author.

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