Dear Zorg,
Last night, I had a dream.
It was a dream of a wonderful place.
It was a dream of a Sega bar, where yuppies like ourselves could unwind, surrounded in various Sega memorabilia. Like Hard Rock Cafe, but MUCH COOLER.
In this dream, I ordered a beer, which came in a pint glass with a huge picture of Sonic on. The beer was coloured blue, and contained caffeine, so you too could feel you were as fast as Sonic. Cocktails came in a variety of novelty shaped glasses, one of which was Ulala, and you could drink a suitably orange cocktail from it. There was a Dreamcast on the wall, and Daytona USA cabinets as far as the eye could see.
I was so pleased that I found this bar that I asked some tall, long haired man in a leather jacket (who, of course, in real-life would not be allowed in due to draconian dress-code rules) to take a photo on my mobile phone so I could send it to UK:R. However, on consulting my mobile phone when I awoke, I found that I had not just fallen asleep in a drunken stupor with the ability to piss a blue stream from all the Sonic beer, but had just had a dream.
This is a dream that Sega must make reality. Please look into it.
Thank you,
Chris
A site about games and game paraphernalia and how nothing's as good as we remember it, probably because we used to inhabit a FANTASY WORLD.
MICRO-BLOG
What are we half-heartedly skimming RIGHT NOW? RECENTLY...
Each post .02% worse than the last. SONIC RIP-OFF - AUSTRALIAN DIVISION PLAYSTATION3 BRINGING DOWN SONY - $3.3 BILLION LOS... EXCLUSIVE: THE 100 GREATEST GAMES OF ALL TIME ELSEWHERE ON "THE NETWORK" #00028 GAMES NIGHT SOCK-CHANGING MYSTERY FORTUNATELY, THIS LISTING HAS ENDED METAL GEAR SOLID 4 HAS "MINIMAL" IMPACT ON PS3 SAL... MUSIC FESTIVALS SHOULD BE NUKED FROM SPACE THE HTML ERAS
When men used to till the pages by hand. |
SHOPS
Use our Play or Amazon Shops to buy those shit Wii games you secretly like, helping the effort. ARCHIVES
12 years of wheat and chaff in one vast and impenetrable mass. |
Some updates weren't universally hated by the entire world within seconds of being uploaded.
1. The Animal Crossing Wild World mega-feature and public-service review
2. Sonic CD - screenshot parade
3. Cream The Rabbit sexual diagrams
4. OutRun2 screenshot-taking guide for the benefit of inept journalists
5. The personal UKR SEGA Toys Homestar planetarium review
6. Trying to buy an Xbox 360 in London
7. (STILL) THE MOST AMAZING PROMOTIONAL PHOTOGRAPH OF ALL TIME
8. A trip to GamesMaster (in Peckham)
Links to that blog of yours you started up and were excited about for a whole weekend.
FRIENDS
Some people we might've MET. Or at least seen in a room and been near. One Thousand Tiny Things I Hate "LIFESTYLE"
Other sites we are happy to officially endorse without requiring Adwords spend. PRIVACY POLICY
Having one is compulsory, apparently. Ours is here. It is not meant to be funny. |
ACQUAINTANCES
People off the internet. Quality and commitment levels may vary. |
It came with the template. Maybe in 2014 we'll jump on board the Twitter train and put that in here. Or a radio. That'd be nice.
"So I dreamed that Sony announced a new game that would be good. Then, ten years later, I dreamed it was finally released. It was average! That's way better than below average! Anyone hear anything about the next Metal Gear?"
Thinking my efforts were derisory - it was a free update, how shit can I be? - I got close to suicide and/or buying a PS3.
Pah - and while I'm there tchah!