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Look, look! We can be a "Proper" games site and appeal to a diverse range of gamers, just like that other one. Today to prove we ever play anything apart from PSP games that make your head go funny, here's our list of predictions for Metroid Pinball.

- It might be as good as Sonic Pinball Party

- It will definitely be better than Pinball Of The Dead

- It won't be as good as Pinball Fantasies, Pinball Dreams, Devil Crash or Sonic Spinball

- It will cost money, and therefore be more expensive than downloading ROMs for Medieval Madness and Addams Family off the internet

- It won't be exhibit A in an American rape case or smell of stale fags and WILL ACTUALLY WORK unlike a real pinball table

- [PLACEHOLDER] Probably type a joke in about Advanced Pinball Simulator here too later

xtra ball lol

WHAT WE'D RATHER SEE INSTEAD

Metroid Pachinko. Hundreds of Samus Arans pour in through the top of the screen and you get to keep the ones that go down her special holes. When you run out you can choose to take your tiny Samuses and either gamble them by putting them back in the machine, or a second option which makes them take all their clothes off and run around in the lower screen naked. Then you can use the DS touchpen to pour boiling water or hold a magnifying glass over them.

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