This advert is a temp agency advertising for Babel Media. Babel Media in Hove, Brighton are the sole UK testers of N-GAGE SOFTWARE. There is a special room for N-Gage testing called the "Nokia Lab". Nokia have DEMANDED that *NO* N-Gages or code or anything leave the room, nor any electronics of any kind (laptops, computers, USB sticks, the works) ENTER the room. You can't even take a bag in. The room has CCTV and electronic locking devices, Metal Gear Solid style. Even Sony, Microsoft and Nintendo all let debug and test hardware roam around an open plan office as long as it is locked up at night.
No food or drink is allowed in this room. N-Gages have to be logged and checked at all times. And get this: if the MMC needs to be removed (old style, before the QD revision) for any reason, Babel Media are required to FILM THE N-GAGE BEING OPENED on VIDEO CAMERA and have two signed witnesses sign the video tape. You cannot use a witness more than once.
One of the Technical Requirements of N-Gage software is that the game must not run at more than 24 fps. Another is that software cannot require more than two buttons to be pressed at once. Every other week and on random occasions, men from Nokia arrive to check conditions. They wear black suits and sunglasses, ala Men In Black. They still haven't spotted the irony of the MIB2 poster on the wall.
I swear on Ed Lomas' life that all the above is true, but if you reprint any of this, please don't print my name. Call me "Jason Ho" or something.
A site about games and game paraphernalia and how nothing's as good as we remember it, probably because we used to inhabit a FANTASY WORLD.
What are we half-heartedly skimming RIGHT NOW?
Each post .02% worse than the last.
THE HTML ERAS
When men used to till the pages by hand.
12 years of wheat and chaff in one vast and impenetrable mass.
Some updates weren't universally hated by the entire world within seconds of being uploaded.
Links to that blog of yours you started up and were excited about for a whole weekend.
Some people we might've MET. Or at least seen in a room and been near.
Other sites we are happy to officially endorse without requiring Adwords spend.
Having one is compulsory, apparently. Ours is here. It is not meant to be funny.
People off the internet. Quality and commitment levels may vary.
It came with the template. Maybe in 2014 we'll jump on board the Twitter train and put that in here. Or a radio. That'd be nice.