UK:RESISTANCE 'main page'
There is no joke here. Reporting facts like these makes us feel like Michael Buerk standing in famine-torn Africa in 1984, or that bloke who said "Oh the humanity" when that air-thing caught on fire. You can see the disaster for yourselves. Words are meaningless at desperate times like these.

FIFA Street has taken over the country. It's probably going to win the general election. A CG Wayne Rooney will be prime minister, and new education minister MC Harvey will write a rap about school dinners. He will rhyme "reconstitued meat" with "FIFA Street".

Will the last person leaving the country please turn off the power strip so the Xboxes don't go up.

We'd find it easier to go into a pharmacy and ask for "AIDS CREAM" than go to a game shop for a copy of FIFA Street.

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