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Considering how little we update the site, it's amazing how quickly these News Archives start to fill up. It seems like only yesterday we uploaded that legenday first UK:Resistance logo. Oh hang on, it was only yesterday, I've been slipping through rips in the fabric of time again. This archive goes from about April 98 to October 98, including all of those names we thought up for Dreamcast 'New Names Week'...

Something else rather interesting to emerge from ECTS was the news that SOE do intend to supply the modem as standard for the Euro Dreamcast after all. A round of applause for SOE please! Oh, and also the also DreamCast is so powerful, it`s even got an internal fan. Phew.

It's time for a new feature! This one's called 'Trade Magazine MCV Reports' and is quite similar to our old favourite 'Trade Magazine CTW Reports' only this time we copy news out of new trade mag MCV instead. Strangely, MCV stands for 'The Market For Home Computing And Videogames' - we have emailed them suggesting a name-change to TMFHCAV to avoid confusion. Anyway...

  • This week, trade magazine MCV reports that Capcom are setting up Capcom Eurosoft, essentially a much-needed European wing of their operation, based in London and concentrating on maximising the Capcom brand-name over here.
  • This week, trade magazine MCV also reports that Banjo-Kazooie is the best-selling N64 game in the Czech Republic.
  • This week, trade magazine MCV also reports that retailers in Liverpool seem to be selling more Saturn software than anywhere else in the country, with scouse Saturn game sales almost level with "limp" N64 figures. However, as you'd expect, piracy is said to be a major problem amongst the shell-suited, moustachioued, thieving northern bastards.

  • ECTS post scripts: One Saturn game was spotted on the main floor - a steering wheel add-on manufacturer was demonstrating its product on the Saturn version of Sega Rally! Common-touch glam-popstars Pulp played at the 3000 people-packed Sony aftershow party! Telling people that you're "from UK:Resistance" does not open any doors.

    Here's a bit of World Exclusive Sega ECTS news - they gave away Dreamcast-badged silver laser-pens to most people who saw the demos! More exciting news later!

    Hey look! We've had no ECTS reports whatsoever! Sorry about that, but to be honest, we're yet to see anything relating to Sega, save for a malfunctioning version of PC Sega Rally 2 that played well of the few occasions the car was on the track instead of floating through the scenery. Impartial readers might like to know that Zelda 64 was there and playable (in English too), there was loads of PlayStation stuff and the usual array of dodgy, tired-looking women dancing to earn money to fuel their heroin addictions. We may enter Sega's secret Dreamcast chamber today, so stay tuned, although rumour is they're only (!) showing Sonic Adventure, with the 1.5-party stuff either super-super-secret or not there at all...

    So, the ECTS starts tommorrow (Sunday). I`ll probably be going on Monday (to avoid the brats) so stay tuned for the legendary `Jon`s ECTS report.` If all goes well, we should have the lowdown on the juicy Dreamcast stuff that`s rumoured to be on display. If all goes badly, I wont even be let in to the `invite only` Sega bash (Shame! - Gary) and I`ll just have to go to the main hall and stare at Jo Guest for a few hours. Actually,.........

    `Golden-balls-soccer-wonderkid` Michael Owen (you know, the one who scored that incredible goal against the dirty cheating Argies?) has been signed by Eidos to endorse the forthcoming World League Soccer `99 game. We don`t know why we`re bothering to tell you this though, because this time there won`t be a Saturn version.

    To further refute speculation that we don't update the site often enough (but also confirming the suggestion that we never upload anything of interest), it's time for another Employee of the Week Anyone care to explain what Jon's on about below?

    Word zipped out across the internet in the wee hours of Friday morning that Jon M was dead. Before you read on, be assured this is not true. But at Midnight Greenwich mean time, the headlines read: "Jon M Killed at Age 28."

    Apparently, someone at the Sony Europe offices told the editors of a web magazine that Jon M had died from a gunshot wound to the head.

    An hour later, after emails flew out across the globe and a thousand editors of a million webmags began work on their "Jon M: Remembered" feature articles, the magazine that broke the story finished the job: "Jon M Alive!" It seems a phone call cleared the matter up.

    We`d better preempt any `no updates` moaning by quickly telling you that Mr Irimajari was recently heard to say that the Dreamcast is as powerful as the beefiest PC you can currently think of, and may even be upgradeable in the future without sacrificing backwards compatability. Is that good enough?

    Okay... we can either spend hours ripping-off all of the shots and posting them here pretending we've got some kind of exclusive, or we can let Game Online do all of the hard work for us and simply tell you to Click Here For Hardcore Sonic Picture Action!

    With the ECTS* promising (perhaps) the first chance for most people to see the Dreamcast in action (a stand featuring twelve Saturn's playing Deep Fear is still a possibility though), we thought it might be a good idea to give you some comprehensive directions to help you all find Sega's off-site bunker, which is once again situated outside the main ECTS* exhibition hall.

    *The European Computer Trade Show (ECTS) should not be confused with the European Cheese Tasting Seminar (ECTS), which, once again, has been confusingly scheduled to take place the following weekend.

    Here's something amazing, someone has actually sent us a review! Okay, so it`s a bit late now and most of you probably never take a blind bit of notice of our reviews section anyway but should you be interested, here's a review of King of Fighters 97

    Ooh, how exciting. We've been given an award. The thing is, the chap who gave us the "highly coveted" award admitted that it's just a cheap attempt to get more people to visit his site, so we therefore suggest that you do not click on the image below. If you do, at least turn off the images on your browser to deny him the satisfaction of a 'hit', also making it look rubbish in the process. Life's hard.

    Here's a bit of news generously cut 'n' pasted from FGNOnline. The implications could be earth-shaking, so read carefully:

    Dreamcast, Dreamcast, Dreamcast. Where will it all end? Latest rumors are emerging from the land of perpetual sunshine. Australia's national Triple J radio station has announced rumors that Dreamcast is scheduled for a late November launch in that country. Japanese companies have recently been testing big products in the nearby Australian market before a full roll-out in the US and Europe. But, as always with Dreamcast, anything is possible.

    Why is this important? Well, more technically-minded readers will know that Australia uses the same PAL TV system that we do, making Ozzie imports a potentially better bet than the confusing Japanese S-VHS system. They also use a vaguely similar version of English too, which is slightly easier to understand than Japanese.

    Do we have any homosexual readers? We get a lot of hits from Australia, so there's a pretty high probability that we do. Anyway, we will now attempt to convert you with this week's excellent Employee of the Week. You will like it.

    Greetings UK:R readers, I`m Leonard Nimoy. I last met Jon and Gary back in 1968 when I made some exciting predictions for the future. Since then I`ve enjoyed an interesting and varied career....um, anyway, now they`ve invited me back to tell you about the revamped UK:R links page. I personally chose the links myself while taking time out from the filming of `Star Trek VIII: The Wrath of Spock (and Kirk)`, which sees me and my good friend Jim resurrected from the dead (again) to do battle with the evil Klingons and stuff. Don`t worry, there`ll be no bald blokes or annoying robot guys in it. Link long and prosper my friends. Leonard: 03/08/98

    Leonard Nimoy, start of 1982 mini-series 'Marco Polo', amongst other things.

    Wheels are in motion, deals are being struck, backs are being patted, knowing smiles are being exchanged and world-altering plans are being formed. The reason? For the last few weeks, Sega Europe have been holding sneak previews of their current Dreamcast demos, inviting key distributors, buyers and generally-quite-important decision-making retail people to witness the power - planning already to get them onboard and willing for the UK launch next year!

    Since yesterday's exclusive revealing of our work on Godzilla 2: UK:Rampage, we've been flooded with requests from readers asking if it will be VMS compatible. Well, we're pleased to announce that there's an entirely new mini-game specifically for the VMS, which sees players controlling Godzilla and destroying famous UK landmarks!

    No! Godzilla is attacking the Houses of Parliament in the fantastic VMS mini-game!

    They're right about these Dreamcasts being easy to program - we've only had our dev-kit for two weeks, and we're already able to reveal our first game! It's called Godzilla 2: UK:Rampage, and is a sequel to Sega's Godzilla, which sees Godzilla ignoring Japan and setting his sights on... the UK! Cor blimey! Godzilla is angry that his favourite food (fish) are being sucked out of the sea by the British fish 'n' chip industry, so he starts to destroy London as his terrible revenge! Players will play the part of UK:Resistance members Jon-ra and Mecha-Gary, utilising futuristic weaponry and ninja techniques to stop the monster... before it gets to Buckingham Palace and eats the Queen!

    Stop Godzilla from eating the Queen! Click on the image to see
    Godzilla 2: UK:Rampage in all its glory.

    Frustrated by blurry, too-dark, low-quality scans of women from magazines? Well, sorry, here's another one in the guise of the latest Employee of the Week

    Frustrated by blurry, too-dark, low-quality scans from Japanese magazines? Head over the Sega Japan's Godzilla page for some awesome full-screen 140k mega-scans!

    It's time for another episode of 'Trade Magazine CTW Reports...'! This week, trade magazine CTW reports (and gets very excited about it too), that a man by the name of Philip Ley is about to be signed-up to spend Sega's 100 million Euro marketing budget for the Dreamcast launch. Why is this news? Because Mr Ley was the man in charge during the early 90s Megadrive boom, starting the ace 'Pirate TV' ads and the seminal 'Cyber razorcut' nonsense that made Sega "cool" all those years ago. Sonic Two's-day was probably one of his too, so expect the Dreamcast launch to be something of an event... probably taking place on the moon or in the future with lots of dancing robots.

    If there`s anyone out there who still wants a Saturn, you can now pick one up for only 69.95. Assuming you can find a shop that still sells them that is.

    It's difficult being right at the edge of the edge of the cutting-edge edge of Internet information, and sometimes, things just get a bit too much for us. Take our Glossary of Terms for example - a good idea, but everything got a little confusing and out of control during the design process, and we ended up with a bit of a mess. Take a look at our English word-explaining mish-mash anyway, you might like it. Just don't expect too much.

    Listen right, word on the street is that SOJ are right pissed about some of the fake or mocked up Dreamcast screenshots appearing on the `net. So they`ve got this geezer who`s like a copper, right? And he`s surfing the web all day looking for any sites that are showing anyfing dodgy. So if you do see anyfing, let us know and we`ll grass the bastards up for ya. Sorted.

    Apologies from our translating department for the mix-up last week, but we can now announce the utterly World Exclusive unveiling of an image of Sonic from his new Dreamcast game on Sega Japan's site!

    Would we lie to you? Actually yes, it's a fake. Had you going for a bit, eh?

    The European Computer Trade Show - for so long the shitty end of the trade show stick - will be well-worth a visit this year, as Sega's booth (once again cleverly located way outside the hall where no one can find it) will feature actual demonstrations of the European Dreamcast developers' games! Sega reckon they won't be showing any of their own-brand games here, instead concentrating on getting the Eurocast scene some publicity. The ECTS starts on the 6th of Spetember, and anyone can blag themselves a ticket by registering online to get in for free. You might need to lie a bit though.

    Fledgling developers Red Lemon have been given a 650,000 investment by venture capitalists `3i` to produce a game for Dreamcast. Andrew Davison of 3i says, "They have the ability to make Red Lemon a significant player in the games world." UK:Resistance are open to similar offers. Well, even 65 would be good. 19/07/98

    Our Japanese translating skills aren't too good, but it looks like Sega of Japan have uploaded some pictures of Sonic Adventures on their Sonic Team site! The screenshots don't show Sonic, instead focusing on some kind of character-driven level based in an office. It looks like Sonic Team have improved greatly on the Iri-San face demo, featuring torsos and even hands of the main characters! Take a look at these great shots:

    The graphics in Sonic Adventures are the most realistic yet. Apprarently the
    man on the right is the 'boss'... hope the rest of the game looks this good!

    Seems like the Dreamcast logo is finding it`s way in to a whole host of strange places. First someone spots it on the wallpaper of Channel 4`s `The Big Breakfast` and now I`ve noticed it in the BK `Chicken Flamer` ad. Is this just chance or is there a subliminal advertising campaign going on? Be sure to let us know if you see the Dreamcast logo anywhere else.

    Here's a rough date for all of you Dreamcast newshounds: "The beginning of August", because that's when a Sega Japan official reckons they will be announcing some Dreamcast news that "Most people have already guessed." Smart money is on the first revealing of Dreamcast VF3, along with maybe a few other launch titles.

    Also of some small interest is the fact that the Godzilla premiere is about to take place in Japan. Having to sit through two hours of low-brow movie toss will be made worth it for one reason - Sega will be there and handing out a limited number of VMSs with copies of their Godzilla game! Expect early hands-on reports from magazines with lucky premiere-attending Japanese reporters...

    Here at UK:Resistance, we often get the feeling that some of you only come here to look at the occassional girly pic. Oh well, better keep you happy

    Just to prove we are actually still supposed to be a gaming site, here`s a little news round-up. Gasp!

  • Very cool looking PC game Outcast is rumoured to be heading to Dreamcast.
  • Infact I know it is. (Probably)
  • Crash Bandicoot coders Naughty Dog are rumoured to be doing Dreamcast stuff too.
  • Look, just about everybody is doing Dreamcast stuff, okay?
  • Lots of Sega sites were fooled by a very shabby hoax about a non-existent developer called Edge Creations.
  • No, it wasn`t anything to do with us.
  • AM2`s new fighting game `Spike` looks cool
  • Thank You: UK:Resistance salutes these fine men (even if one of them plays for Arsenal)

    Our heart-felt sympathies go out to our German and Argentinian readers.

    No! Even our web site has been temporarily occupied by the Argies, but don't worry, HMS Resistance is sailing at full speed to liberate our troubled territory. Do you want our amusing, highly topical reaction to the World Cup events? Then you'd better read our topical news flash on the World Cup

    Have you heard about that SegaCon thing being planned in the US? Some Sega fan has organised a big convention for fans of all things Sega. Anyway, we`ve just heard of a similar event which will take place in the UK and have received this picture of the proposed venue.

    What's this? Self-proclaimed 'industry' magazine Edge being really nice about the Dreamcast, even going so far as to suggest it's vitally important to the future of their magazine? Blimey, they must've been really impressed with what they saw. Enjoy this while it lasts, as one sniff of PlayStation 2's apron will have 'em swooning for Sony once again, but at least they seem to be on the right track at the moment.

    Someone sent us some pics from Godzilla the other day. I don`t know about you, but with a multi-million pound special effects budget I would have expected something better. Let`s hope the Sega VMS game looks a bit better. 21/06/98

    Retard: An interesting rumour reaches us regarding the Katana OS. Apparently, there might be a simplified version for the American market. It will be cheaper to produce and possibly even slower than the Japanese one! Not that we`re saying Americans are `simple` or anything......it`s probably all to do with the Microsoft involvement.

    A hunch: Hmm, we spend a lot of time thinking about things. Usually they're too illegal or perverse to upload here (see below), but here's a good one - you know that "original AM2 title" that's supposedly being developed for the Katana? Well, how does VF4 sound? Think about it - a couple of extra backgrounds, a couple of extra characters and hey-presto - the most incredible Japanese launch title imaginable! Hey, it's just a thought, it was either that or no update at all today.

    One of Jon's `thoughts` - preparing his home made 'Electro Wank' immersion suit for another session. (No Gary, you can`t borrow it: Jon)

    These are desperate times. Not only is Resident Evil 2 fluttering her eyelids seductively from shop shelves across the country, gently whispering "buy me, buy me!" into the prickling earholes of battle- hardened Saturn owners, but the brazen hussy Gran Turismo will also be hitching up her skirts, trying to tempt us to stray away from the path of righteousness, towards the dark valley of PlayStation. Be strong! Resist temptation! At least we have the consolation of being able to play an arcade perfect version of X-Men vs Stree... oh hang on, that's just making it worse. X-Men vs Street Fighter will not be coming out over here - and that's official. Well, a good guess, anyway. It's over. Stop crying and take it like a man.

    New Name Week - Bumper weekend special! - The final desperate twitchings from our burnt out brains.

    1. AMX
    2. VR1
    3. B52
    4. Gunjet
    5. Messiah
    6. Advantage
    7. Vantage
    8. Blur
    9. Revolution
    10. Reaction
    11. Fury
    12. Savage
    13. Thunder
    14. Destroyer
    15. Commander
    16. Rage
    17. Futura (VR)
    18. Fusion (VR)
    19. Dream (VR)
    20. Tempest

    21. Intravoidal Vodavox
    22. Futran Devastator
    23. Omniversal Transunicom
    24. Redigital Electraset
    25. Supaglobal Interpolator
    26. Gary
    27. Transmonic Interphaser
    28. Supatronic Biphase Regule-8
    29. Jon M-ulator
    30. Hyperwarp Spacechaser
    31. Megasonic Game-o-tron
    32. Technojam Hardcard
    33. Mister Games
    [Notes: Right. Th... that's it. No more, please no more. Must stop n... now. Must rest.]

    New Name Week - Day five: The oh-so predictable 'last minute box of chocolates from the garage on Christmas Eve' selection.

    1. Phoenix
    2. Millennium (please no)
    3. Sega 128
    4. Sega 64
    5. Sega System
    6. Sonic System
    7. Resistance (!)
    8. Segacom
    9. Eclipse
    10. Equinox
    11. 2000
    12. Saturn 2
    [Notes: If the new machine is called 'Millennium', we will close down UK:Resistance and completely give up hope. No joke.]

    New Name Week - Day four: Bestiality Special! (and other animals...)

    1. Tiger
    2. Dragon
    3. Hawk
    4. Lion
    5. Jaguar (D'oh!)
    6. Hardvark
    7. Stallion
    8. Stud
    9. Ram
    10. Neoram
    11. Ramjet
    12. Netram
    [Notes: We reckon some kind of mythical beast name would be a popular choice, but thanks to our lack of education we can't really think of any. Read a book on the subject.]

    New Name Week - Day three: Japanese longshots and assorted friends.

    1. Gunsujin
    2. Netsujin
    3. Neotaku
    4. Cybersujin
    5. Netsuo
    6. Unitaku
    7. Supasujin
    8. Utopia
    9. Storm
    10. Neostorm
    11. Vanguard
    12. Voyager
    [Notes: Considering the difficulty of coming up with one global name, we reckon there's a pretty high chance of a Megadrive/Genesis-style dual name system. Come back tomorrow for the 'bestiality special!']

    New Name Week - Day two: The Supa collection and various other coolities.

    1. Supagrid
    2. Supacom
    3. Supanet
    4. SupaVR
    5. Supabox
    6. Supa-X
    7. Supagate
    8. Hotgrid
    9. Hotgun
    10. Gridstar
    11. Neostar (Hmm, Neo Geo CD?)
    12. Neonet
    [Notes: Older variants on the 'supa' theme (replace supa with hyper, mega, ultra and so-on) were considered, but ultimately rejected, due to sounding a bit too "eighties." However, we still reserve the right to claim victory if a hyper/mega/ultra variation of any of our selections is used.]

    New Name Week! After last week's "final" list of ideas for the new machine's name, we've been spending the weekend thinking up some more, hence this special print-out-and-keep New Name Week Special Edition of UK:Resistance! Rest assured, by the end of this week's special, we will have come up with the proper name. Or gone mad. One of the two: Let's go, brainstormers:

    Day one: Box crazy.

    1. Box
    2. Powerbox
    3. Unibox
    4. Neobox
    5. Netbox
    6. Ultrabox (Oh Vienna!)
    7. Gridbox
    8. Hotbox
    9. Telebox
    10. Hibox
    11. Gunbox
    12. Topbox
    [Notes: Giving the machine a name with the word 'box' in it, seems to create some kind of generic mass appeal feel (ie Hoover and Xerox), instead of the indifference created by a cool product name. The machine would therefore become synonymous with games/Internet applications, and would be an essential global purchase! Come back tomorrow for the next batch!]

    Back once again: Yeah, yeah. Just because we haven`t done Employee of the week for ages you thought we`d run out of Brit girls to feature didn`t you. No chance

    26 days: Well, it looks like the nearly famous 'May 15th' Internet rumour is wrong - but only by five days, as apparently a full-on Japanese Sega show is now planned for May 20th, in which the official 'stuff' about Sega's new console will be announced. So any web sites with 'Katana' or 'Dural' in the title had better think about a hasty name change.

    The UK:Resistance "It's gotta be one o' these ten" final new machine names list:

    1. Black Box
    2. Blue Box
    3. Blue Star
    4. Redcom
    5. Omnitronic Phase Oscillator
    6. Neodrive
    7. Exdrive
    8. Unicom
    9. Comstar
    10. Any cool letter/number combination ie - DX1, EX9, JX2, X2, P9 etc.
    There's a videotape demo of top arcade sequel Daytona USA 2 doing the rounds in the UK at the moment, and guess what? It looks bloody amazing. Only the first track is featured, but this visual hybrid between Daytona and Scud Race is fantastic, with great crashes, crumpled bodywork flapping after a big smash, and even a look at the engine when the bonnet gets ripped off in a big crunch! The first course is very similar to the original's 777 Speedway oval, but set inside a gorgeous dome surrounded by waterfalls and pretty scenery. Oh and the music is cheesy thrash rock!

    Rumours that Tantalus have been signed to code the Katana version of Daytona 2 have been fabricated purely for comic effect.

    New look: So, you've been wondering why we haven't updated the site for a while? Well, we've actually been undertaking a massive redesign of the whole site! It's just about complete, so click here to check out the newly redesigned site. Most of the changes are pretty subtle, so they probably won't be immediately obvious, but we think it's huge improvement to the original. Tell us what you think!

    Excuse2: My excuse fo the lack of updates? I`ve been...erm, teaching myself Japanese with the aid of the Panzer Saga intro for the last two weeks. Anyway, here`s some snippets of info.

    House of the Dead pipped Panzer for the number one spot in the Saturn sales charts this week. HotD is only 34.99. PDS is only 39.99. Sega Rally 2 is out now in the better arcades and it`s very cool. Nice touches include; `Nice Touch 1` upon completion of the championship your car does `doughnuts` in the car park, accompanied by lots of smoke and cheering. `Nice Touch 2` You get to enter your name at the start, and it then appears on the rear windows of the car, great if you`ve got a three-letter name like me! Jon:16/04/98

    Tell us your Sega Rally 2 name:

    My three letter Sega Rally 2 name.

    Beet `em up: I know they never got round to bringing out any games for the Saturn, but Bizarre Creations (they did F1 for the Playstation) are actually real life Sega fans, and they`ve asked us to print their latest press release, in return for free review copies of any `Katana` games they might do in the future. 01/04/98

    Revelation 2: So you thought there was nothing particularly interesting to come out of the recent TGS show in Japan? Well think again, One of our Japanese readers who happened to be at the show, was able to gain access to a `behind the scenes` developers meeting, and he managed to obtain this, the first picture of the `Katana`!!. Rumour has it that there are some screenshots of Katana games going around too, so keep an eye out for those. Jon:01/04/98

    And there goes our 'insider' status too. It was good while it lasted, although we probably didn't rip enough articles out of SEGA SATURN MAGAZINE to make a big impact... unlike other, less scrupulous individuals. And can you believe some people thought Godzilla 2 UK:Rampage was a real game? Tut, tut.