Employee of the week (with a difference)

Right. I think we've already proved the fact that the UK is generally 'better' than anywhere else in the world, so from now on we're only going to employ "British Babes" (© Every Single UK Tabloid Newspaper) to work with us. Until we run out. Then we'll go back to using old American boilers.

Brookside, a TV tale about the lives and loves of simple everyday northern folk, just wasn't the same after 'lovely' Anna Friel left. She died from some horrible disease (after being put in jail for the joint manslaughter of her dad who she buried under the patio before the body was discovered by Eddie and Jimmy when their garden started to flood and they excavated it to see why and now Jimmy lives there and her mum lives in Bristol with Sinbad's illegitimate love-child where she does charity work with other abused women. No shit!). Now she wants to be a serious actress - where better to start than playing the lead-role in this year's UK:Resistance pantomime!

Last week's star