VM games available for download

F355 Challenge(168k)
Retard mode. Adds simplistic arcade steering so today's new breed of gamers with poor concentration skills can actually stay on the track for more than 30 seconds. Also known as EDGE mode.[download!]

Virtua Tennis (188k)
Henman mode. More of a realism patch. Prevents the player from winning anything when using Tim Henman. And his posh stuck up parents are now visible amongst the spectators.[download!]

Tony Hawks Pro Skater (288k)
A new level is added to the game in which Tony must negotiate London's Soho Square on one of those chrome scooters. Avoiding all the other trendy twats doing the same.[download!]

Ready 2 Rumble 2 (78k)
Paramedic mode. After your boxer is knocked out, you have control of the paramedics who must supply oxygen and sedatives at ringside. A mini driving game is then introduced where you must reach the hospital within 5 minutes - or your boxers head explodes due to the increasing pressure of the blood clot.[download!]

Who Wants To Be A Millionaire (144k)
Simple update. Removes Chris Tarrant.[download!]

Quake 3 (62k)
Brightens up the dreary colour pallette. Displays a timer on screen which shows Days-Months-Hours-Minutes until the infinitely better Unreal Tournament is released.[download!]

Silent Scope(152k)
Lee Harvey mission. Could Oswald really hit a moving target three times in six seconds from 322 yards and reload 3 times in the process? Here's your chance to find out in this accurate recreation of dealey plaza. [download!]

Shen Mue - Perv mode. Bored with looking through the drawers in the Hazuki residence? This mini game allows you to explore the drawers in Nozomis bedroom. Find her underwear drawer and steal a "souvenir" before the time limit expires.[download!]

18 Wheeler(422k)
Motorway Services level. Try to buy a sandwich and a packet of crisps for less than 18.00 from a Motorway Service station.[download!]

Soul Calibur (198k)
Adds new selections of knickers for the female fighters. Now available are 'g-string' and 'crotchless' additional designs. [download!]

Metropolis: Street Racer (268mb)
Fantasy RPG in which it's possible to ACTUALLY BUY the game. [download!]

Sonic Adventure upgrade (212k)
Turns the whole game into 2D, so it's actually playable and controllable, and almost as good as the old versions that came out years ago. [download!]

Buggy Heat (129k)
Adds commentary by Murray Walker, who continually marvels at how rubbish the game is. [download!]

Shen Mue (256k)
Adds more pointlessly anal features to pad out the desperately thin gameplay. Paint a wall in the downtown area and marvel at the 256 levels of dryness it cycles through. Go for a piss. Spend eight hours ACTUALLY ASLEEP. [download!]

Official Disc Despair (243k)
Accurately recreates the disappointment felt by gamers upon seeing what awful games are on the Official Magazine's demo disc. Includes 128 frowns, 512 profanities and 18 hand gestures. [download!]

Sega Bass Fishing (114k)
Adds new features to more accurately reflect fishing off the coast of Britain - panty liners, used condoms, barrels of toxic waste and mutated radioactive cod may now be caught. [download!]

Virtua Striker 2000 (123k)
Removes cross-dressing, spoilt tosser David Beckham from the rosters, to avoid offending... everyone. [download!]

Sega Rally 2 (59k)
This simple fix turns the shitty PAL conversion into the cracking Japanese original. [download!]

Ready 2 Rumble (212k)
Adds more women fighters. Increases chest size of existing female fighters. [download!]

Formula One (156k)
Adds realism by turning David Coulthard into the useless, whining, incompetent, Scottish twat that he is in real life. Also adds "Eddie Irvine Mode" which introduces several adult-themed sub-games, mostly involving pissing on Miss World competitors. [download!]

Ready 2 Rumble (98k)
Adds Naseem Hamed to the line up, allowing gamers to enjoy punching the arrogant little wanker to their heart's content. Extra points awarded for hitting the twat in the nuts. [download!]

Have you spotted any extra VM games we've missed? Please Mail Us and give us the details... any good ones get added to this very page.